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February 2006

Dear Friends of German Comedy,

Another appalling month comes to an end.

What annoyed me most during January was so-called consumer group Stiftung
Warentest with their inappropriate comments about a lack of safety in some of the World Cup stadiums. There are brigades of constructors, officials and experts planning and liaising for years to build stadiums to top standard only for those self-loathing Warentest spoilsports to turn up at the grounds, conduct superficial examinations, jump to erroneous conclusions and make us look a third-world country.
Hardly ever have I agreed more with Franz Beckenbauer then when he said that “Stiftung Warentest might know what it’s talking about with face creams, olive oil and vacuum cleaners, so it should stick to them.” That will presumably all be made up nonsense as well but it doesn’t embarrass us on international stage.

A talking point over here was the Queen’s New Year’s honours list, which caused upset in parts of the country. Not because of the omission of decent, hard-working, law-abiding citizens but because my grandmother didn’t include any of Liverpool’s players after their freakish Champions League triumph. Nothing wrong with that one might say but she awarded each and everybody connected with the England cricket team an MBE for finishing second from bottom in a recent series with Australia. That indeed seems wrong.

I found the whole argument pointless though. Firstly there is no British Empire left anyway and secondly if those overpaid football ballerinas really thrive for those honours they should just sponsor a school or, even better, donate money directly to Labour party. They could give their first speech in the House of Lords within a fortnight.

The Sun won this month Kraut-bashing competition hands down thanks to its excellent twist on the fact that some World Cup host cities bought counter-terrorism gadgets that protect the grounds 24/7 and know a bomb when they see one. The Sun headline read “Britskrieg” and fantasises about pint-sized tanks that will monitor England fans.
Various photos of Hitler and some jokes, bad enough to be part of my stand-up
routine, accompanied the article. http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2005580313,00.html
Overall German-bashing kept a surprisingly low profile during January though
as tabloids were sidetracked by various shenanigans of some leading Liberal
Democrats and George Galloways’s heroic efforts of speaking up for the people
of Iraq on Big Brother.

Auf geht’s Deutschland


August 2018

2 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
3 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
4 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
5 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
8 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
9 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
10 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
11 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
12 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
15 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
16 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
17 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
18 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
19 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
22 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
23 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
24 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
25 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
26 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT


September 2018

19 – LONDON – Betsey Trotwood – TICKETS
20 – WAVENDON – The Stables – SOLD OUT
21 – WAVENDON – The Stables – SOLD OUT
22 – WAVENDON – The Stables – SOLD OUT
26 – BRIDPORT – Electric Palace – SOLD OUT
27 – BRIDPORT – Electric Palace – SOLD OUT
28 – WIMBORNE – Tivoli Theatre – SOLD OUT
29 – WIMBORNE – Tivoli Theatre – SOLD OUT


October 2018

4 – LOUGHBOROUGH – Town Hall – TICKETS
5 – MALVERN – Forum – SOLD OUT
6 – GUILDFORD – G Live – SOLD OUT
7 – LEAMINGTON SPA – Royal Spa Centre – TICKETS
11 – BEDFORD – Corn Exchange – TICKETS
12 – LEEDS – City Varieties – TICKETS
13 – LEEDS – City Varieties – TICKETS
18 – CHESTER – Story House – SOLD OUT
19 – SALFORD – Lowry Lyric Theatre – TICKETS
20 – SALFORD – Lowry Lyric Theatre – TICKETS
25 – KINGS LYNN – Corn Exchange – TICKETS
26 – PETERBOROUGH – The Cresset – TICKETS
27 – LINCOLN – The Engine Shed – TICKETS


November 2018

8 – WORTHING – Pavilion – SOLD OUT
9 – BEXHILL – De La Warr Pavilion – SOLD OUT
10 – SOUTHEND – Cliff’s Pavilion – TICKETS
15 – ST ALBANS – Alban Arena – SOLD OUT – Extra date 30 May 2019 – TICKETS
16 – DARTFORD – The Orchard – TICKETS
17 – READING – Hexagon – SOLD OUT
21 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
22 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
23 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
24 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
28 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
29 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
30 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS


December 2018

1 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
5 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
6 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
7 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
8 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
12 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
13 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS 
14 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
15 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS 

 


February 2019

6 – EXETER – Corn Exchange –TICKETS
7 – EXETER – Corn Exchange – TICKETS
8 – SWINDON – Wyvern Theatre –TICKETS
9 – SWINDON – Wyvern Theatre –TICKETS
14 – ALDERSHOT – Princes Hall – TICKETS
15 – LEICESTER – De Montfort Hall – TICKETS
16 – BROMLEY – Churchill Theatre –TICKETS
17 – BRIGHTON – Dome – TICKETS
21 – WHITLEY BAY – Playhouse – TICKETS
22 – HARROGATE – Royal Hall – TICKETS
23 – SHEFFIELD – Octagon – TICKETS


March 2019

1 – BASINGSTOKE – The Anvil – TICKETS
2 – CAMBRIDGE – Corn Exchange – TICKETS
7 – NOTTINGHAM – Playhouse – TICKETS
9 – BUXTON – Opera House – TICKETS
22 – STEVENAGE – Concert Hall – TICKETS
23 – CREWE – Lyceum – TICKETS
29 – BIRMINGHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS
30 – WREXHAM – William Aston Hall – TICKETS 
31 – SHREWSBURY – Theatre Severn – TICKETS


April 2019

5 – PORT TALBOT – Prince’s Royal Theatre – TICKETS
6 – CARDIFF – St David’s Hall – TICKETS
7 – SOUTHAMPTON – The Mayflower Theatre – TICKETS
12 – SALISBURY – City Hall – TICKETS
13 – TORQUAY – Babbacombe Theatre – TICKETS
14 – CHELTENHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS


May 2019

2 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS SOON
3 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS SOON
4 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS SOON
10 – COVENTRY – Warwick Arts Centre Butterworth Hall – TICKETS
16 – CHATHAM – Central Theatre – TICKETS
17 – MARGATE – Winter Gardens – TICKETS
23 – YEOVIL – Westlands – TICKETS
24 – BARNSTAPLE – Queens Theatre – TICKETS SOON
25 – WESTON-SUPER-MARE – Playhouse – TICKETS SOON


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