This Bulletin is from May 1st, 2009

Achtung Britische!?

Published: May 2009 in The Fix, Britain’s foremost comedy magazine

This May you can learn about real (German) humour! Henning Wehn explains

Herr Kuhnle, the funniest man from Düsseldorf – and I – the German Comedy Ambassador – will drag a version of our Edinburgh and Melbourne show 1000 Years of German Humour across Blighty.

Admittedly the show title is a bit of a misnomer as Teutonic jolliness obviously dates back much further than just one magnificent millennium. (Joke number 1)
But let me introduce you to four of the many highlights of German hilarity:

The bat trick

Invented by the Neanderthalers in 40,000 BC this is the world’s oldest piece of physical humour: It involves sneaking up behind a fellow cage man and smacking him one over the head so hard he passes out. Then everyone starts laughing.
Hilarious! There’s still nothing funnier for Germans than seeing someone getting beaten up. Preferably a Dutchman.

Garden gnome taming

With the old Bavarian saying that humour is the little brother of inebriety in mind it doesn’t come as a surprise that lots of German humour has been invented at beer festivals.
Since medieval times the big social highlight of every beer festival is the performance of the garden gnome tamer. Luckily Herr Kuhnle is one of only 7 officially licensed garden gnome tamers and will bring some of his charges to Britain: Hans, Johann-Wolfgang, Friedrich and Horst, a foster gnome from The Gambia who is forced by Herr Kuhnle to perform the most dangerous tricks.

Folk music

Expect a rendition of ‘Im Fruehtau zu Berge’, Herr Kuhnle and my favourite German folk songs. It roughly translates as ‘Get up early in the morning so you’ll get a lot done” which is nothing but commonsense so clearly lacking  in all that foreign modern music on the radio. All those rubbish songs seemto go along the lines of ‘Uh,uh, I’ll fly to the moon on an orange elephant and once I’m up there I’ll smoke crack cocain, uh, uh”. Pathetic! But don’t worry – German folk music keeps it real. Get up early, identify the problem and then solve it. Bloody result!

The ring

Without wanting to reveal too much about the show I can tell The Fix readers that the biggest highlight of German humour is Der Ring der Nibelungen, an old saga turned into a magnificent opera by the likeable composer Richard Wagner in the 19th century. The plot revolves around incestuous love of two twins, Siegmund and Sieglinde and one ring or another. Considering the vulgar content it’s hard to fathom why it’s set on the Rhine rather than the Mersey.
Anyway, the whole opera takes about five days to perform but the first four nothing much happens. In that respect it’s very similar to test cricket. Outside Pakistan, anyway.

If you’re still not decided if 1000 Years of German Humour will be for you let me assure you that it’s not going to be real-time. Mind you, it might feel like it. (Joke number 2)

Auf gehts Deutschland!


Current Live Dates...

July 2018

24 – LONDON – Betsey Trotwood – SOLD OUT
25 – LONDON – Betsey Trotwood – SOLD OUT
26 – LONDON – Betsey Trotwood – SOLD OUT


August 2018

2 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
3 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
4 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
5 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
8 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
9 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
10 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
11 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
12 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
15 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
16 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
17 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
18 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
19 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
22 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
23 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
24 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
25 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT
26 EDINBURGH – Just The Tonic Caves – SOLD OUT


September 2018

20 – WAVENDON – The Stables – SOLD OUT
21 – WAVENDON – The Stables – SOLD OUT
22 – WAVENDON – The Stables – SOLD OUT
26 – BRIDPORT – Electric Palace – SOLD OUT
27 – BRIDPORT – Electric Palace – SOLD OUT
28 – WIMBORNE – Tivoli Theatre – SOLD OUT
29 – WIMBORNE – Tivoli Theatre – SOLD OUT


October 2018

4 – LOUGHBOROUGH – Town Hall – TICKETS
5 – MALVERN – Forum – SOLD OUT
6 – GUILDFORD – G Live – SOLD OUT
7 – LEAMINGTON SPA – Royal Spa Centre – TICKETS
11 – BEDFORD – Corn Exchange – TICKETS
12 – LEEDS – City Varieties – TICKETS
13 – LEEDS – City Varieties – TICKETS
18 – CHESTER – Story House – SOLD OUT
19 – SALFORD – Lowry Lyric Theatre – TICKETS
20 – SALFORD – Lowry Lyric Theatre – TICKETS
25 – KINGS LYNN – Corn Exchange – TICKETS
26 – PETERBOROUGH – The Cresset – TICKETS
27 – LINCOLN – The Engine Shed – TICKETS


November 2018

8 – WORTHING – Pavilion – TICKETS
9 – BEXHILL – De La Warr Pavilion – TICKETS
10 – SOUTHEND – Cliff’s Pavilion – TICKETS
15 – ST ALBANS – Alban Arena – SOLD OUT – Extra date 30 May 2019 – TICKETS
16 – DARTFORD – The Orchard – TICKETS
17 – READING – Hexagon – TICKETS
21 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
22 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
23 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
24 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
28 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
29 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
30 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS


December 2018

1 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
5 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
6 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
7 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
8 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
12 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
13 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS 
14 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
15 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS 

 


February 2019

6 – EXETER – Corn Exchange –TICKETS
7 – EXETER – Corn Exchange – TICKETS
8 – SWINDON – Wyvern Theatre –TICKETS
9 – SWINDON – Wyvern Theatre –TICKETS
14 – ALDERSHOT – Princes Hall – TICKETS
15 – LEICESTER – De Montfort Hall – TICKETS
16 – BROMLEY – Churchill Theatre –TICKETS
17 – BRIGHTON – Dome – TICKETS
21 – WHITLEY BAY – Playhouse – TICKETS
22 – HARROGATE – Royal Hall – TICKETS
23 – SHEFFIELD – Octagon – TICKETS


March 2019

1 – BASINGSTOKE – The Anvil – TICKETS
2 – CAMBRIDGE – Corn Exchange – TICKETS
7 – NOTTINGHAM – Playhouse – TICKETS
9 – BUXTON – Opera House – TICKETS
22 – STEVENAGE – Concert Hall – TICKETS
23 – CREWE – Lyceum – TICKETS
29 – BIRMINGHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS
30 – WREXHAM – William Aston Hall – TICKETS 
31 – SHREWSBURY – Theatre Severn – TICKETS


April 2019

5 – PORT TALBOT – Prince’s Royal Theatre – TICKETS
6 – CARDIFF – St David’s Hall – TICKETS
7 – SOUTHAMPTON – The Mayflower Theatre – TICKETS
12 – SALISBURY – City Hall – TICKETS
13 – TORQUAY – Babbacombe Theatre – TICKETS
14 – CHELTENHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS


May 2019

2 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS SOON
3 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS SOON
4 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS SOON
10 – COVENTRY – Warwick Arts Centre Butterworth Hall – TICKETS
16 – CHATHAM – Central Theatre – TICKETS SOON
17 – MARGATE – Winter Gardens – TICKETS
23 – YEOVIL – Westlands – TICKETS SOON
24 – BARNSTAPLE – Queens Theatre – TICKETS SOON
25 – WESTON-SUPER-MARE – Playhouse – TICKETS SOON


Sign Up For Henning's Newsletter

Pop your details in here... MORE INFO