This Bulletin is from May 1st, 2009

Achtung Britische!?

Published: May 2009 in The Fix, Britain’s foremost comedy magazine

This May you can learn about real (German) humour! Henning Wehn explains

Herr Kuhnle, the funniest man from Düsseldorf – and I – the German Comedy Ambassador – will drag a version of our Edinburgh and Melbourne show 1000 Years of German Humour across Blighty.

Admittedly the show title is a bit of a misnomer as Teutonic jolliness obviously dates back much further than just one magnificent millennium. (Joke number 1)
But let me introduce you to four of the many highlights of German hilarity:

The bat trick

Invented by the Neanderthalers in 40,000 BC this is the world’s oldest piece of physical humour: It involves sneaking up behind a fellow cage man and smacking him one over the head so hard he passes out. Then everyone starts laughing.
Hilarious! There’s still nothing funnier for Germans than seeing someone getting beaten up. Preferably a Dutchman.

Garden gnome taming

With the old Bavarian saying that humour is the little brother of inebriety in mind it doesn’t come as a surprise that lots of German humour has been invented at beer festivals.
Since medieval times the big social highlight of every beer festival is the performance of the garden gnome tamer. Luckily Herr Kuhnle is one of only 7 officially licensed garden gnome tamers and will bring some of his charges to Britain: Hans, Johann-Wolfgang, Friedrich and Horst, a foster gnome from The Gambia who is forced by Herr Kuhnle to perform the most dangerous tricks.

Folk music

Expect a rendition of ‘Im Fruehtau zu Berge’, Herr Kuhnle and my favourite German folk songs. It roughly translates as ‘Get up early in the morning so you’ll get a lot done” which is nothing but commonsense so clearly lacking  in all that foreign modern music on the radio. All those rubbish songs seemto go along the lines of ‘Uh,uh, I’ll fly to the moon on an orange elephant and once I’m up there I’ll smoke crack cocain, uh, uh”. Pathetic! But don’t worry – German folk music keeps it real. Get up early, identify the problem and then solve it. Bloody result!

The ring

Without wanting to reveal too much about the show I can tell The Fix readers that the biggest highlight of German humour is Der Ring der Nibelungen, an old saga turned into a magnificent opera by the likeable composer Richard Wagner in the 19th century. The plot revolves around incestuous love of two twins, Siegmund and Sieglinde and one ring or another. Considering the vulgar content it’s hard to fathom why it’s set on the Rhine rather than the Mersey.
Anyway, the whole opera takes about five days to perform but the first four nothing much happens. In that respect it’s very similar to test cricket. Outside Pakistan, anyway.

If you’re still not decided if 1000 Years of German Humour will be for you let me assure you that it’s not going to be real-time. Mind you, it might feel like it. (Joke number 2)

Auf gehts Deutschland!


Current Live Dates...

December 2018

12 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
13 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS 
14 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – SOLD OUT
15 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – SOLD OUT


February 2019

6 – EXETER – Corn Exchange – SOLD OUT
7 – EXETER – Corn Exchange – SOLD OUT
8 – SWINDON – Wyvern Theatre –TICKETS
9 – SWINDON – Wyvern Theatre –TICKETS
14 – ALDERSHOT – Princes Hall – TICKETS
15 – LEICESTER – De Montfort Hall – TICKETS
16 – BROMLEY – Churchill Theatre – SOLD OUT
17 – BRIGHTON – Dome – TICKETS
20 – WHITLEY BAY – Playhouse – TICKETS
21 – WHITLEY BAY – Playhouse – SOLD OUT – Extra date added 20 Feb
22 – HARROGATE – Royal Hall – SOLD OUT
23 – SHEFFIELD – Octagon – TICKETS


March 2019

1 – BASINGSTOKE – The Anvil – TICKETS – Extra date 16 November
2 – CAMBRIDGE – Corn Exchange – TICKETS – Extra date 23 November
3 – EPSOM – Playhouse – TICKETS
7 – NOTTINGHAM – Playhouse – TICKETS
8 – NOTTINGHAM – Playhouse – TICKETS – Added date
9 – BUXTON – Opera House – TICKETS
22 – STEVENAGE – Concert Hall – TICKETS
23 – CREWE – Lyceum – TICKETS
29 – BIRMINGHAM – Town Hall – SOLD OUT – Extra dates 11 & 12 October – TICKETS
30 – WREXHAM – William Aston Hall – TICKETS
31 – SHREWSBURY – Theatre Severn – SOLD OUT – Extra date 13 October –  TICKETS


April 2019

5 – PORT TALBOT – Prince’s Royal Theatre – TICKETS
6 – CARDIFF – St David’s Hall – TICKETS
7 – SOUTHAMPTON – The Mayflower Theatre – TICKETS
12 – SALISBURY – City Hall – TICKETS
13 – TORQUAY – Babbacombe Theatre – TICKETS
14 – CHELTENHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS


May 2019

2 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS
3 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS
4 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS
10 – COVENTRY – Warwick Arts Centre Butterworth Hall – TICKETS
11 – CHESTERFIELD – The Winding Wheel – TICKETS
12 – LICHFIELD – Garrick Theatre – SOLD OUT
16 – CHATHAM – Central Theatre – TICKETS
17 – MARGATE – Winter Gardens – TICKETS
18 – BEXHILL – De La Warr Pavilion – TICKETS
23 – YEOVIL – Westlands – TICKETS
24 – BARNSTAPLE – Queens Theatre – TICKETS
25 – WESTON-SUPER-MARE – Playhouse – TICKETS
26 – BRISTOL – Old Vic – TICKETS
30 – ST ALBANS – Alban Arena – TICKETS
31 – GUILDFORD – G Live – TICKETS


June 2019

1 – READING – Hexagon – TICKETS
6 – WORTHING – Pavilion – TICKETS
7 – SHANKLIN – Shanklin Theatre – TICKETS
8 – BOURNEMOUTH – Pavilion – TICKETS
15 – ST HELIER – Jersey Opera House – TICKETS


July 2019

27 – YORK – The Barbican – TICKETS
28 – MACCLESFIELD – Gawsworth Hall – TICKETS


August 2019

1 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
2 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
3 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
4 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
8 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
9 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
10 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
11 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
15 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
16 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
17 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
18 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
22 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
23 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
24 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
25 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS


September 2019

26 – REDHILL – The Harlequin – TICKETS
27 – WATFORD – Collosseum – TICKETS
28 – NORTHAMPTON – Derngate – TICKETS


October 2019

3 – CHELMSFORD – Civic Theatre – TICKETS SOON
4 – IPSWICH – Regent Theatre – TICKETS
5 – NORWICH– Theatre Royal – TICKETS
6 – DARTFORD – The Orchard – TICKETS SOON
10 – TUNBRIDGE WELLS– Assembly Hall – TICKETS
11 – BIRMINGHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS
12 – BIRMINGHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS
13 – SHREWSBURY – Theatre Severn – TICKETS
18 – GLASGOW – Pavilion Theatre – TICKETS
19 – DUNFERMLINE – Alhambra Theatre – TICKETS SOON
20 – NEWCASTLE upon TYNE – Theatre Royal – TICKETS
25 – PORTSMOUTH – Guildhall – TICKETS
26 – LONDON – PALLADIUM – TICKETS – On Sale 10am Fri 14 December


November 2019

7 – DONCASTER – Cast – TICKETS SOON
8 – KENDAL – Leisure Centre – TICKETS
9 – CARLISLE – The Sands – TICKETS
14 – DUNSTABLE – Grove Theatre – TICKETS
15 – HIGH WYCOMBE – Wycombe Swan – TICKETS
16 – BASINGSTOKE – The Anvil – TICKETS SOON
22 – COLCHESTER – Charter Hall – TICKETS
23 – CAMBRIDGE – Corn Exchange – TICKETS SOON
29 – DORKING – Dorking Halls – TICKETS SOON
30 – CRAWLEY – The Hawth – TICKETS


December 2019

5 – BRADFORD – St Georges Hall – TICKETS
6 – MIDDLESBROUGH – Town Hall – TICKETS
8 – SCARBOROUGH – Spa Hall – TICKETS SOON


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