This Bulletin is from June 28th, 2006

Germany breathes again – the Cloggies are out

What a great few days for the Fatherland and, in particular, for Franz Beckenbauer. The Kaiser incredibly found time between attending nearly every game of the World Cup so far to get married again last Friday.
Getting married, like watching lots of football, gets easier the more you do it and, though he spent a whole day neglecting his World Cup duties, our “Emperor” still received thousands of cards wishing him well. Graham Poll alone sent three.

Last weekend’s party got into full swing when Nationalmannschaft showed the hapless Swedes that they should stick to making furniture. My favourite scene was Henrik Larsson’s David Beckham-style penalty over the crossbar. It’s good to see everybody getting the jitters again when they face Jens Lehmann from the spot.

But let’s not get carried away; so far Germany have achieved nothing more than England and six other nations and failure is still an option (although for Germany, obviously, failure isn’t an option).

Back in Baden-Baden, what comes as a genuine surprise to many locals is the lack of social class of the England squad and in their entourage. Germans still had the idea of British people having a stiff upper lip, wearing bowler hats and having some manners. I’m therefore happy for all you English that your football team and their “WAGs” gave a more accurate description of life in Modern Britain: scantily clad yobettes falling about in the streets, spending the GDP of any given African country on booze and designer clothes .

England might not be our favourite guests, but thank God we can rule out one disaster of historic dimensions: the Netherlands winning the World Cup. “Without Holland we’re going to Berlin,” as millions of relieved Germans sang after the Cloggies’ defeat to Portugal. Police already report that traffic on the autobahns is running a lot smoother now that all the caravans are back in the Netherlands.
The Kaiser will no doubt be delighted about that when he’s in his helicopter on the way to his next game – or wedding.


Current Live Dates...

December 2018

12 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS
13 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – TICKETS 
14 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – SOLD OUT
15 – LONDON – Leicester Square Theatre – SOLD OUT


February 2019

6 – EXETER – Corn Exchange – SOLD OUT
7 – EXETER – Corn Exchange – SOLD OUT
8 – SWINDON – Wyvern Theatre –TICKETS
9 – SWINDON – Wyvern Theatre –TICKETS
14 – ALDERSHOT – Princes Hall – TICKETS
15 – LEICESTER – De Montfort Hall – TICKETS
16 – BROMLEY – Churchill Theatre – SOLD OUT
17 – BRIGHTON – Dome – TICKETS
20 – WHITLEY BAY – Playhouse – TICKETS
21 – WHITLEY BAY – Playhouse – SOLD OUT – Extra date added 20 Feb
22 – HARROGATE – Royal Hall – SOLD OUT
23 – SHEFFIELD – Octagon – TICKETS


March 2019

1 – BASINGSTOKE – The Anvil – TICKETS – Extra date 16 November
2 – CAMBRIDGE – Corn Exchange – TICKETS – Extra date 23 November
3 – EPSOM – Playhouse – TICKETS
7 – NOTTINGHAM – Playhouse – TICKETS
8 – NOTTINGHAM – Playhouse – TICKETS – Added date
9 – BUXTON – Opera House – TICKETS
22 – STEVENAGE – Concert Hall – TICKETS
23 – CREWE – Lyceum – TICKETS
29 – BIRMINGHAM – Town Hall – SOLD OUT – Extra dates 11 & 12 October – TICKETS
30 – WREXHAM – William Aston Hall – TICKETS
31 – SHREWSBURY – Theatre Severn – SOLD OUT – Extra date 13 October –  TICKETS


April 2019

5 – PORT TALBOT – Prince’s Royal Theatre – TICKETS
6 – CARDIFF – St David’s Hall – TICKETS
7 – SOUTHAMPTON – The Mayflower Theatre – TICKETS
12 – SALISBURY – City Hall – TICKETS
13 – TORQUAY – Babbacombe Theatre – TICKETS
14 – CHELTENHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS


May 2019

2 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS
3 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS
4 – OXFORD – Playhouse – TICKETS
10 – COVENTRY – Warwick Arts Centre Butterworth Hall – TICKETS
11 – CHESTERFIELD – The Winding Wheel – TICKETS
12 – LICHFIELD – Garrick Theatre – SOLD OUT
16 – CHATHAM – Central Theatre – TICKETS
17 – MARGATE – Winter Gardens – TICKETS
18 – BEXHILL – De La Warr Pavilion – TICKETS
23 – YEOVIL – Westlands – TICKETS
24 – BARNSTAPLE – Queens Theatre – TICKETS
25 – WESTON-SUPER-MARE – Playhouse – TICKETS
26 – BRISTOL – Old Vic – TICKETS
30 – ST ALBANS – Alban Arena – TICKETS
31 – GUILDFORD – G Live – TICKETS


June 2019

1 – READING – Hexagon – TICKETS
6 – WORTHING – Pavilion – TICKETS
7 – SHANKLIN – Shanklin Theatre – TICKETS
8 – BOURNEMOUTH – Pavilion – TICKETS
15 – ST HELIER – Jersey Opera House – TICKETS


July 2019

27 – YORK – The Barbican – TICKETS
28 – MACCLESFIELD – Gawsworth Hall – TICKETS


August 2019

1 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
2 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
3 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
4 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
8 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
9 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
10 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
11 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
15 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
16 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
17 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
18 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
22 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
23 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
24 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS
25 – EDINBURGH – The Queen’s Hall – TICKETS


September 2019

26 – REDHILL – The Harlequin – TICKETS
27 – WATFORD – Collosseum – TICKETS
28 – NORTHAMPTON – Derngate – TICKETS


October 2019

3 – CHELMSFORD – Civic Theatre – TICKETS SOON
4 – IPSWICH – Regent Theatre – TICKETS
5 – NORWICH– Theatre Royal – TICKETS
6 – DARTFORD – The Orchard – TICKETS SOON
10 – TUNBRIDGE WELLS– Assembly Hall – TICKETS
11 – BIRMINGHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS
12 – BIRMINGHAM – Town Hall – TICKETS
13 – SHREWSBURY – Theatre Severn – TICKETS
18 – GLASGOW – Pavilion Theatre – TICKETS
19 – DUNFERMLINE – Alhambra Theatre – TICKETS SOON
20 – NEWCASTLE upon TYNE – Theatre Royal – TICKETS
25 – PORTSMOUTH – Guildhall – TICKETS
26 – LONDON – PALLADIUM – TICKETS – On Sale 10am Fri 14 December


November 2019

7 – DONCASTER – Cast – TICKETS SOON
8 – KENDAL – Leisure Centre – TICKETS
9 – CARLISLE – The Sands – TICKETS
14 – DUNSTABLE – Grove Theatre – TICKETS
15 – HIGH WYCOMBE – Wycombe Swan – TICKETS
16 – BASINGSTOKE – The Anvil – TICKETS SOON
22 – COLCHESTER – Charter Hall – TICKETS
23 – CAMBRIDGE – Corn Exchange – TICKETS SOON
29 – DORKING – Dorking Halls – TICKETS SOON
30 – CRAWLEY – The Hawth – TICKETS


December 2019

5 – BRADFORD – St Georges Hall – TICKETS
6 – MIDDLESBROUGH – Town Hall – TICKETS
8 – SCARBOROUGH – Spa Hall – TICKETS SOON


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