Dear Friends of German Comedy,
A very action-packed month draws to an end.
The most disturbing news came from Southend where the pier burned down for the fourth time. What’s that all about? I’ve already warned the major if the pier’s bowling alley isn’t open in time my family and I shall spend our next summer holidays in Margate. I’m sure we’ll manage to enjoy ourselves on Kent’s beach chairs just as well.
October was also an eventful month for football. And I don’t mean Bayern Munich taking optimum points in Champions League whilst all other German teams failed to deliver. That unfortunately has become a given.
No, the big news was England qualifying comfortably for the World Cup ahead of Poland and Austria. Our two main provinces really aren’t the forces they were in the past. Admittedly, Austria hasn’t impressed since before the war.
I’m glad to report that English tabloids lived up their reputation. No sooner had England qualified than, surprise, surprise, the tabloid war started. Daily Star got out of the blocks quickest:
Killjoy Germans have hit England football fans with a World Cup booze ban. Only alcohol-free beer will be sold at stadiums where England are playing, while fans of other nations can sup full-strength
That all was accompanied by a carton in which two England supporters try to buy drinks wearing typical local outfit. One bloke was sporting a Bavarian maid’s outfit and the other one was wearing a Prussian uniform. Who fears next year to be World War II all over again will find comfort in a campaign by “Englandfans, the national team’s official supporters’ club.
It intends to distribute 10,000 postcards in Germany and produce T-shirts containing Basil Fawlty’s words “Don’t mention the war” as part of an effort to use wit and humour to woo locals who may be fearing the worst.” (Observer)
Let’s be realistic – what are England supporters expected to mention if not the war? I lived here for the past three years and couldn’t remember a single programme on telly that featured Germany past 1945. Let me put it this way – if it wouldn’t be for the BBC I still wouldn’t know how to goosestep properly. Instead of wasting money on pointless campaigns England would be better off to have a more pragmatic approach and build more prisons….or hospitals in case England has to play in East Germany.
What confused me most in October was the total public ignorance towards Harold Pinter pinching the 2005 Noble Prize for Literature, a truly worldwide competition where writers of all nationalities and backgrounds are eligible to lift the trophy. Compare this to the inexplicable fuss that was made about England winning the Ashes, a competition where runner-up is the worst possible outcome.
Whoever expected good, old Harold to be driven around London in an open-top bus and cheered on by the masses must have been bitterly disappointed. Then again, Pinter is best known for his pauses. Maybe he’ll celebrate sometime in spring when no one expects him to.
On 3rd October Germany ‘celebrated’ the 15th anniversary of its reunification and it could not have been a happier one as the jubilee came only two weeks after the general election, in which 26% of the East Germans voted for the Communists. My mate Horst labelled it the biggest act of ungratefulness he ever experienced and who am I to disagree.
Looking on the bright side, I heard about a recent survey that shows that Germany’s economic downturn has increased the popularity of its people abroad because apparently we come across as more human. I for one must say I liked it better when we were regarded as clinically efficient superhumans and produced the results to back this up.
Third time lucky – have a good November!
Please find below some of my November gigs.
It would be great if you could come along to one of them.
Venue details can be found on www.chortle.co.uk
4th, Chiswick Headliners
5th, Electric Empire Clapham
11th, South Hill Park Arts Centre Bracknell
17th Roar with Laughter, Enfield
20th Downstairs King’s Head, Crouch End
26th Buzz Club, Manchester
But most and foremost I’m happy to advertise Offside Comedy Club, my own brand-new monthly gig. It will take place every second Monday of each month at Adams Park, home of Wycombe Wanderers FC.
Offside Comedy Club, Scores Bar, Adams Park, Hillbottom Road, High Wycombe, HP12 4HJ
When: Monday, 14th November, starts: 8 pm, doors: 7pm
Line-up: David Hadingham, Tony Law, Lee Bannard and MC Henning Wehn
Tickets: £9 normal / £6 season-ticket holders and recipients of this email.
Please send an email to email@example.com to book your tickets for the concession rate.
Please send me also an email if you don’t want to receive this monthly newsletter any more.