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December 2008

Dear Friends of German Comedy,

It’s Britain’s riskiest comedian sending you this email.

I recently got a weekend of gigs moved to next year as the promoter feared complaints and violence if I was on in front of his drunken Xmas audience.

Jawohl, take that Brendon Burns, Steve Hughes, Jim Jeffries and all those other self-proclaimed hard men of comedy! How many gigs did they ever have cancelled because a promoter feared crowd trouble weeks before their appearance?

Those pussy cats can spend all day trying to be outrageous – they will never be able to compete with the offence a German passport can cause.

Coming back to Britain from a short trip to Berlin for a meaningless friendly (ok, ok, yes, England fully deserved to win) I realized why London is so attractive to us foreigners but so exhausting for locals.

It hit me when I was booked for Five Live’s Fighting Talk and was made look a right idiot when not knowing who John Sergeant was.

But I didn’t feel guilty because when I left that Monday the gutter press wanted to hang everybody to do with Haringey Council for what his mother did to Baby P. It was only on my return four days later that the baying mob demanded the scalp of reality TV judges who said someone called John Sergeant wasn’t good at singing.

What might at first glance look like a sad indictment of celebrity obsession and superficiality is in truth proof that Britain is the most welcoming place in the world. One needs to be in the country only a few days before one will be able to back some hysterical campaign and feel a fully-fledged part of society.

What makes life hard though is sustaining this high level of outrage about non-events. It’s especially hard in a big city such as London as life in a big city ideally requires a certain degree of apathy and perspective.

But don’t worry! Once you start slacking there will always be a free paper and its aggressive distributor to make sure you don’t miss the next bandwagon.

So, that’s enough Sauerkraut for one newsletter. Talking about Sauerkraut – I highly recommend my Christmas shows (yes, my links get better every time) at Betsey Trotwood in Farringdon from Dec 8-10.

In addition to my finest stand-up there will be renditions of Germany’s most favourite Christmas carols such as ‘Oh Tannenbaum’, ‘Stille Nacht – heilige Nacht’, and ‘Klingglöckchen klingelingelingelingelingeling’. Jawohl, I have ways of making you laugh and sing!


Alternatively you can wait until next May and see me at Lee Hurst’s Backyard Club.

Have a great December and a good start to 2009 and don’t complain about the NHS to me – Whittington Hospital did a great job on my hernia!

Auf Wiedersehen


May 2022

7th - Cardiff - St Davids Hall - TICKETS
8th - Southampton - Mayflower - TICKETS
12th - Barnstaple - Queens Theatre - TICKETS
13th - Yeovil - Westlands - TICKETS
14th - Weston super Mare - The Playhouse - TICKETS
15th - Port Talbot - Princess Royal Theatre - TICKETS
20th - Torquay - Babbacombe Theatre - TICKETS

June 2022

3rd - Shanklin IOW - Shanklin Theatre - TICKETS
4th - Bournemouth - Pavilion - TICKETS
5th - Weymouth - Pavilion - TICKETS
9th - Nottingham - Playhouse - TICKETS
10th - Nottingham - Playhouse - TICKETS
11th - Reading - The Hexagon - TICKETS
16th - Doncaster - The Cast - TICKETS
17th - York - The Barbican - TICKETS
18th - Bradford - St Georges Hall - TICKETS
30th - Douglas Isle of Man - Gaiety Theatre - TICKETS

July 2022

2nd - Kendal - Leisure Centre - TICKETS
31st - Macclesfield - Gawsworth Hall - TICKETS

August 2022

4th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
5th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
6th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
11th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
12th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
13th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
18th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
19th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
20th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
25th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
26th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
27th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS

September 2022

22nd - Epsom - Playhouse - TICKETS
23rd - Aldershot - Princes Hall - TICKETS
24th - Redhill - Harlequin - TICKETS
30th - Worthing - Pavilion - TICKETS

October 2022

1st - Brighton - Dome - TICKETS
6th - Harrogate - Royal Hall - TICKETS
7th - Birmingham - Town Hall - TICKETS
8th - Birmingham - Town Hall - TICKETS
14th - London - Palladium - TICKETS
15th - Portsmouth - Guildhall - TICKETS
20th - Chelmsford - Civic Theatre - TICKETS
21st - Ipswich - Regent Theatre - TICKETS
22nd - Dunstable - Grove Theatre - TICKETS
28th - Tunbridge - Assembly Hall - TICKETS

November 2022

11th - Rhyl - Pavilion Theatre - TICKETS
12th - Warwick - Butterworth Hall - TICKETS
17th - Oxford - Playhouse - TICKETS
18th - Oxford - Playhouse - TICKETS

February 2023

24th - Leeds - City Varieties - TICKETS
25th - Leeds - City Varieties - TICKETS

March 2023

3rd - Horsham - Capitol Theatre - TICKETS
4th - Dorking - Halls - TICKETS
5th - Canterbury - Marlowe Theatre - TICKETS
10th - St Albans - Arena - TICKETS
11th - Colchester - Charter Hall - TICKETS
12th - Norwich - Theatre Royal - TICKETS SOON
17th - Chesterfield - Winding Wheel - TICKETS SOON
18th - Stockport - Plaza - TICKETS
19th - Lichfield - Garrick Theatre - TICKETS SOON
23rd - New Brighton - Floral Pavilion - TICKETS
24th - Hull - City Hall - TICKETS SOON
25th - Middlesborough - Town Hall - TICKETS SOON


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