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December 2010

Dear Friends of German Comedy,

I initially planned to send this month’s newsletter in good time to advertise my solo shows in Glasgow, Leicester and London as tickets to those would have made for tremendous Christmas presents.

Unfortunately I left it too late and now the moment has passed and loads of people will be given socks and cheese graters rather than tickets to Teutonic jolliness at its best.

Ah, well, to quote Alan Shearer after England’s failed bid to host World Cup 2018: “I am not sure [I] could have done any more”.

Being less complacent might have been a good start but never mind.

Shearer’s self-congratulatory attitude was still less jarring than England bid leader Andy Anson’s whinging ‘You don’t know who to trust. It’s all done in shady backroom dealings’, after emerging from three days of extensively wining and dining foreign despots in shady backrooms.

‘What signal does this send to the world? Neither Russia nor Qatar are meritocracies and ability and experience count for nothing’ said the President of the English Football Association, 28-year-old Prince William.

‘Unlike Britain both host countries lack the most basic democratic structures’ said David Cameron, himself only the 19th Prime Minister to have attended Eton.

His director of communications Rupert Murd…no, Andy Coulson added: ‘The Russian and Qatari media landscape is well suspect, too. Politicians are listening in on journalists’ voicemail messages and we all know it should be the other way round’.

FIFA’s official reasoning to award the World Cup to Abramovich was that Eastern Europe never hosted a World Cup, which is nonsense.

If only the English delegation would have had someone that actually follows football. They could have pointed out that at World Cup 2006 five games were played in Leipzig, Eastern Europe.

In fact, Leipzig is so far East you can see Sarah Palin’s house from there.

The Geordie Messiah thinks he couldn’t have done any more. David Beckham meanwhile doesn’t need to do any more. He has been given a Lifetime Achievement award at the BBC’s Sports Personality of the Year ceremony for his mighty career haul of one non-domestic trophy.

This in itself demands another Lifetime Achievement award; by the UK’s Marketing Society.

I’m now off to Luton Airport to experience some of that fabled British Dunkirk spirit, and best case scenario, catch my plane home.

With all airports being rampacked it can’t be just me looking forward to the Islamification of Europe. There will be a lot less people travelling at Christmas and fares will be a lot cheaper too.

Have a great start to 2011 and if you’re still looking for Christmas presents and don’t want to go to the 24-hour garage…. ….tickets for Leicester, Glasgow, London are available below.

Frohe Weihnachten

Henning


February 2022

9th - Camberley - Camberley Theatre - TICKETS
10th - Andover - The Lights - SOLD OUT
11th - Andover - The Lights - SOLD OUT
17th - Stafford - Gatehouse - SOLD OUT
18th - Leicester - De Montfort Hall - TICKETS
19th - St Albans - Alban Arena - TICKETS
23rd - Shrewsbury - Theatre Severn - TICKETS
24th - Shrewsbury - Theatre Severn - SOLD OUT (Extra date 23rd February added)
25th - Salford - The Lowry - TICKETS
26th - Buxton - Opera House - TICKETS

March 2022

3rd - Wycombe - Swan - TICKETS
4th - Chatham - Central Theatre - TICKETS
5th - Southend - Pavilion - TICKETS
18th - London - Hackney Empire - TICKETS
24th - Lincoln - Engine Shed - TICKETS
25th - Kings Lynn - Corn Exchange - TICKETS
26th - Cambridge - Corn Exchange - TICKETS
27th - Tunbridge Wells - Assembly Hall - TICKETS
31st - Crawley - The Hawth - TICKETS

April 2022

1st - Margate - Winter Gardens - TICKETS
7th - Cheltenham - Town Hall - TICKETS
8th - Cheltenham - Town Hall - TICKETS
9th - Bath - Forum - TICKETS
21st - Arbroath - Webster Theatre - TICKETS
22nd - Dundee - Whitehall Theatre - TICKETS
23rd - Aberdeen - Tivoli Theatre - TICKETS
24th - Inverness - Eden Court - TICKETS
30th - Guildford - G Live - TICKETS

May 2022

7th - Cardiff - St Davids Hall - TICKETS
8th - Southampton - Mayflower - TICKETS
12th - Barnstaple - Queens Theatre - TICKETS
13th - Yeovil - Westlands - TICKETS
14th - Weston super Mare - The Playhouse - TICKETS
15th - Port Talbot - Princess Royal Theatre - TICKETS
20th - Torquay - Babbacombe Theatre - TICKETS

June 2022

3rd - Shanklin IOW - Shanklin Theatre - TICKETS
4th - Bournemouth - Pavilion - TICKETS
5th - Weymouth - Pavilion - TICKETS
10th - Nottingham - Playhouse - TICKETS
11th - Reading - The Hexagon - TICKETS
16th - Doncaster - The Cast - TICKETS
17th - York - The Barbican - TICKETS
18th - Bradford - St Georges Hall - TICKETS
30th - Douglas Isle of Man - Gaiety Theatre - TICKETS

July 2022

2nd - Kendal - Leisure Centre - TICKETS

August 2022

4th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
5th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
6th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
11th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
12th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
13th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
18th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
19th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
20th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
25th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
26th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS
27th - Edinburgh - The Queen's Hall - TICKETS

September 2022

22nd - Epsom - Playhouse - TICKETS
23rd - Aldershot - Princes Hall - TICKETS
24th - Redhill - Harelquin - TICKETS
30th - Worthing - Pavilion - TICKETS

October 2022

1st - Brighton - Dome - TICKETS
6th - Harrogate - Royal Hall - TICKETS
7th - Birmingham - Town Hall - TICKETS
8th - Birmingham - Town Hall - TICKETS
14th - London - Palladium - TICKETS
15th - Portsmouth - Guildhall - TICKETS

November 2022

12th - Warwick - Butterworth Hall - TICKETS

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